Boosting Your Teen’s Self-Esteem: A Simple Mental Trick

Does your teen often feel insecure or unhappy? Do they compare themselves to others and feel inadequate? Are they avoiding new challenges because they fear failure or rejection? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you’re not alone. Many teens struggle with low self-esteem and social comparison, especially in today’s world where they are constantly exposed to images and messages that tell them how they should look, act, and live.

But there is a way to help your teen overcome this negative cycle and feel more confident and satisfied with themselves and their life. And it’s surprisingly simple: all they need to do is memorize a complex number while looking at pictures of attractive people.

Sounds too good to be true, right? But it’s actually backed by science. In this article, we will explain how this technique works, why it matters, and how you can use it to help your teen boost their self-esteem and happiness.

The Study

The technique we are talking about is based on a study that was published in the journal Body Image in 2017. The study involved 149 women who had acknowledged that looking at media images caused them to feel bad about themselves.

The researchers divided the women into three groups and asked them to rate their mood and their satisfaction with their appearance before and after looking at pictures of attractive models.

The first group was asked to memorize a complex eight-digit number while viewing the images. The second group was asked to memorize a simple number while viewing the images. The third group viewed pictures that didn’t depict people, such as landscapes and animals.

The results showed that the images they saw did not affect the women who were preoccupied with a complex number. Their moods remained stable and they rated their attractiveness the same. The women who only had a simple number to remember, however, experienced a decline in their mood and self-esteem. They felt worse about themselves after looking at the pictures. The women who viewed neutral pictures also didn’t show any changes in their mood or self-image.

What does this study mean to your teen?

It means that when they have something on their mind, they are less likely to be influenced by social comparisons. They are less likely to feel inadequate or unhappy when they see others who seem to have it better than them. They are more likely to focus on themselves and their own goals, rather than on others and their achievements.

So how can you use this technique to help your teen feel better about themselves? Here are some steps:

Find some pictures of attractive people that your teen might compare themselves to. You can use magazines, websites, social media, or any other source. Make sure the pictures are realistic and not too edited or filtered.

Ask your teen to rate their mood and their satisfaction with their appearance on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is very low and 10 is very high. Write down their ratings.

Give your teen a complex eight-digit number to memorize. You can use a random number generator or make up your own. Make sure the number is not too easy or too hard to remember.

Ask your teen to look at the pictures of attractive people while repeating the number in their head. Tell them to do this for about 10 minutes or until they lose interest in the pictures.

Then, ask your teen to rate their mood and their satisfaction with their appearance again on the same scale. Compare their ratings with the previous ones.

You will likely notice that your teen’s ratings have not changed much or have even improved after doing the mental task. This means that they have not been affected by the images they saw and have maintained or increased their self-esteem.

Boosting Happiness: Gratitude, Passion, and Success

The technique we have shared with you is a simple and effective way to help your teen stop comparing themselves to others and boost their self-esteem. But it’s not the only thing you can do. There are other ways to help your teen create a rich and fulfilling life that will make them less prone to comparison and more confident in themselves.

Here are some suggestions:

Encourage your teen to cultivate gratitude. Gratitude is the antidote to comparison. It helps your teen focus on the positive aspects of their life and appreciate what they have, rather than on what they lack or what others have.

Gratitude also boosts your teen’s mood, health, relationships, learning, creativity, resilience, generosity, happiness, success, well-being, meaning-making, and purposeful living. Try to practice gratitude daily with your teen by writing down three things they are thankful for, expressing your appreciation for each other, or noticing the beauty and goodness around you.

Pursue passions. Passion is the fuel for happiness and self-esteem. It gives your teen a sense of purpose, direction, and fulfillment. It makes them excited and motivated to get up in the morning and face the challenges of life. It also makes them unique and valuable. Find out what they love to do and do it as often as they can. Whether it’s reading, writing, painting, dancing, cooking, or anything else, follow their passion and let it shine through them.

Celebrate achievements: Achievement is the reward for hard work and effort. It gives your teen a sense of accomplishment, competence, and confidence. It also makes them proud of themselves and their abilities. Don’t be shy to acknowledge and celebrate your teen’s achievements, big or small. Whether it’s getting a good grade, finishing a project, learning a new skill, or reaching a goal, give them a pat on the back and a treat. They deserve it.

Embrace flaws. Flaws are the marks of our humanity and uniqueness. They make us real and relatable. They also make us beautiful and interesting. Don’t be ashamed or afraid of your teen’s flaws, embrace them. They are part of who they are and what makes them special. Instead of trying to hide or change them, learn to accept and love them.

The next time you see your teen comparing themselves to others, remember this: they are more than their appearance. They have a unique personality, a valuable perspective, and a meaningful purpose. And you can help them boost their self-esteem by focusing on their own goals, passions, and achievements.